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04 February 2011 @ 12:31 am
Overly Invested...Again  
It has been a long time since I have had to actively avoid spoilers for a show. Not since Torchwood, I think. I had forgotten how painful it was, caring so much about what happens next that you are desperate for every scrap of material you can find, but also wanting to be surprised so that you actually enjoy the episode. And then there is this thing called context which is a real bitch. You spend days (or even weeks) stressing out about a spoiler you came across which turns out being completely different than you thought because you didn't know the context. Or its exactly what you thought and you are pissed because you were hoping it wasn't. Spoilers suck but unfortunately they are part and parcel with internet fandom and sometimes it is so difficult avoiding them, especially when you have as little willpower as I do.

That lack of willpower must be the reason why I have allowed myself to become this emotionally invested in a show again. Actually, I should be more specific: I have allowed myself to fall in love with another pairing as much as I loved Jack/Ianto and Guy/Marian. And the worse part was that I saw it happening at the beginning and even tried to step back and remind myself that my OTP track record is currently 0 out of 4. All four ended in death and tears (though one was bittersweet tears and he did come back, just not to be with her). For some reason, I fall for those never going to end happily ships and I totally get my heart broken even when I expect it to be (seriously, Robin Hood writers, I am still WTF?! over that season 2 finale).

But despite my hesitation, I fell anyways, and now, here I am, freaking out over spoilers (good & bad) and getting all worked up over another...damn...TV...show. Why do I put myself through this? At least this one has a fairly decent chance of actually ending happily (or hopeful, at the very least). But if it doesn't, I may have to go into therapy.

If I can only survive the next 5 days...
Place: bed
Mood: anxiousanxious
samarajensen on February 5th, 2011 03:39 pm (UTC)
I used to be terrible about looking at spoilers. I had to peek - I just couldn't help myself. But I've gotten much better lately. Except with Supernatural. Because I buy Supernatural Magazine and that is full of spoilers for UK viewers. I try just to look at the pictures until I'm caught up, but it's so difficult...